Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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