sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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