she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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