are you so shy because you have an std?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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