I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
