I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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