Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
