bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
