I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
