shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
