Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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