Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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