Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
