if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter