I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
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