sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Randomize
