I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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