i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
she was so not down for the gang bang
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
