great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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