Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
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Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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