Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
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