He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
You pole danced in your parka.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
