for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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