You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
As shirtless as possible
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
