i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Blood and glitter go together right?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
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