So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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