Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
