weddingsv make me drug and hornr
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
