what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Dick very happy bro
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
