The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
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I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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