Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
