so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize