Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
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Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
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I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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