I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize