is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
