jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
