i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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