Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
