I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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