didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
