Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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