I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
