Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
