I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
