I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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