Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
