so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
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