Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
