in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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