I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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