So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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